"What is needed, rather than running away or controlling or suppressing or any other resistance, is understanding fear; that means, watch it, learn about it, come directly into contact with it. We are to learn about fear, not how to escape from it."

"What is needed, rather than running away or controlling or suppressing or any other resistance, is understanding fear; that means, watch it, learn about it, come directly into contact with it. We are to learn about fear, not how to escape from it."   J. Krishnamurti

I am learning an old lesson in a new way.  If you have been following my blog for the past two months you know I have been on a journey with breast cancer.  After the bilateral lumpectomies on September 28th I felt wonderful within a few days.  So good in fact I cut down a tree in my garden along with the assistance of my senor citizen neighbors Gaylen and Barbara and my daughter Kara using an electric power saw.   With my usual Ultra Feminine Warrior strength I bounced back to focus on life leaving the past two month is the rear view mirror.  As a reward for myself during all of the mammograms and ride in the MRI machine I promised myself that my birthday would be celebrated with both of my children.  We all enjoyed a lovely weekend in West Chester, New York.




Here I am wearing the new Breast Cancer Awareness Statement Necklace I designed for rice rafferty celebrating birthdays with Kara, Barry and Meghan outside of the church where Meghan and Barry are making plans to marry each other ;~)

 

After birthday celebration mass with my family, Meghan and I are bookend birthday Libras, Oct. 9th and 17th ;~)

On the drive back from Barry and Meghan's the doctors office called to ask why I missed my appointment that day.  Kara thinks it was accidentally on purpose as I was so excited to put all of the medical procedure's in my rear view mirror.  I am usually organized to a fault for appointments and responsibilities. Today I will attend a new appointment with destiny.  After speaking with my surgeon over the phone at my insistence she had the unenviable task to break the news cancer cells were found in the biopsy of my right breast.


Doctor said it is not her practice to give patients news like this over the phone but after getting to know me she thought it best to tell me sooner rather than let me wait until today in her office.

So far I learned I have stage 0 Breast Cancer known as DCIS or Ductal Carcinoma In Situ http://www.breastcancer.org/symptoms/types/dcis/

I designed the  rice rafferty Breast Cancer Awareness Statement Necklaces for women Inspired by the Look Good Feel Better  http://lookgoodfeelbetter.org/   I took the training certification classes for Look Good Feel Better  as part of my continuing education while we still lived in Pittsburgh.  The first two statement necklaces I designed I offered to a charity fundraiser in Buffalo, NY and Pittsburgh, Pa.   The people from Viva for Life http://www.roswellpark.org/calendar/2010-09-24/viva-life sent a nice young man out to my home to pick up one necklace.    I did not hear from the Pittsburgh coordinator until she wished me Happy Birthday after their event was over.   Little did I know when I thanked the Creator for health and healing during morning mass for my birthday as I wore this statement necklace, it was not accepted because I would need this one for myself.

I believe in a divine Higher Power who loves all of us and is greater than all of us.  The older I get I am learning everything happens for a reason.   Most importantly I believe in the words of Julian of Norwich   "ALL SHALL BE WELL"  http://www.umilta.net/julian.html

This statement necklace will be with me on my journey inspiring me to look good and feel better.

Forgive me as I have to jump on my stationary bike for 9 kilometers, read from my meditation literature and get ready for my visit with my surgeon at 1:00 today.

As I prepare myself for this journey I remember the words spoken to me often by my mother during the three years I took care of her and daddy before they died seven months apart.
" A gals got to do what a gals got to do."    Velma Rice

Right now I have to go and take care of myself. Thanks for reading my blogs ;~)  Please come back to spend a little time with me as I share my experience of my journey.

Now go make yourself a VERY CREATIVE DAY ;~)   Carol Ann Rice Rafferty

“Run your fingers through my soul. For once, just once, feel exactly what I feel, believe what I believe, perceive as I perceive, look, experience, examine, and for once; just once, understand.”

Albert Einstein quoted - The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious... Sometimes there is lot of story behind a simple look, lot of effort, lot of work, lot of emotions and lot of many things :) which we just simply call mystery..Albert Einstein quoted

Yesterday was a good day.  I enjoyed a lovely, relaxing drive reconnecting with an old friend  during our drive from Buffalo to Syracuse.   Surface Design Association Members from Western New York State were invited to tour the Fiber Program at Syracuse University.  I knew about this invitation for many weeks however I was not able to commit because of a recent death in the family as well as the uncertainty of my own health concerns.   Here I am in a creative play room filled with recycled and up cycled materials.  This plastic chair was so surprisingly comfortable that I could not resist tossing my leg over the arm of the chair during the few minutes we were in this space.You can feel my delight at being able to attend this tour yesterday.

I am in day four of a kind of virtual waiting room. Since August 3rd I have been on a constant call list for repeated needle biopsies and pathology reports of my breasts following a mammogram that showed a tiny cluster of white calcium dots.  The funny part is I FEEL WONDERFUL ;~)   I just returned from my morning three mile walk carrying five pound hand weights for a full body workout.  If I am sick it will be news to my body.  I have just lived one of the best summers of my life enjoying being outside for many wonderful, hot, sunny days.

This virtual waiting room has it's advantages; fragrance of the grass, trees and flowers are more acute.  Food tastes better, colors call me to linger in an attentive gaze. Being with people I love is a treasure for me even when they are preoccupied by the hurry of life.  Life has a Halo Effect when you remember to number your days. I have received kind offers to help in various ways; go to doctors appointments with me, out to lunch, well wishes for good health and promises to keep me in prayer.

It is interesting to listen to the busy plans others have made for the next few months while I have to keep my plans simple on a wait and see day by day basis. Things that would have been important to me or might have hurt my feelings are not as important right now.  Right now I am in this waiting room to get results if I have cancer growing in a mass of cells that I can not even feel.

My purpose of sharing this experience on my blog is not for sympathy or to make you feel sadness. 
I write with the hope that someone who needs a word of encouragement will find my blog and read it one day.  These past few days in the virtual waiting room have been delightfully peaceful.  I have a deep faith in a spiritual reality that is much larger than the physical world we can see.   I believe in a creator who loves all of us and knows exactly what is going on in my life and my body before modern medicine told me they have concerns.  

Right now I continue to be an athlete in training.  I am an Ultra Feminine Warrior   I face life with the same energy and commitment I approached the natural child birth of Barry and Kara.  I will do all best on my part to keep myself strong and healthy then trust that God will bring me to the correct people at the correct time in my life. With the peace that passes understanding I wait...

 Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which passes all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7

 In the words of the Julian of Norwich I believe  
" ALL WILL BE WELL, AND EVERY KIND OF THING WILL BE WELL."
 http://home.infionline.net/~ddisse/julian.html

Althea Harper visits Clothes Bar in Williamsville, NY ;~)

How handy was this ??? Friday afternoon, just as I am going out the door to work an all point bulletin from Nancy Finlayson, contact person for American Sewing Guild in Buffalo, NY. http://www.asg.org/

"Althea Harper from Project Runway will be having a trunk show at The Clothes Bar 4401 Transit Rd, Williamsville, New York tomorrow 5-22 from 1-5:00 PM. She will showcase her spring/summer 2010 collection and will answer questions about her time on the show and also her design career. "

Althea Harper from "Project Runway" is one of the fashion designers competing on season 6 of the Lifetime reality series. Althea from "Project Runway 6" currently lives in Brooklyn, New York, but is originally from Dayton, Ohio. Althea Harper is 24 years old.Althea Harper is a recent graduate from University of Cincinnati (College of Design Art Architecture and Planning) and Central St. Martins in London
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rBJQmYRTEig a clip of Althea from Project Runway 6.

Kara and I have to agree with Althea after our fabulous learning experience as designer and model in recent fashion show; Technology: Progression/Obsession is the theme of this year’s Runway 3.0 fashion extravaganza. Staged in the dramatic, storied industrial space of the Pierce Arrow administration building, Elmwood Avenue, on May 1, by faculty and students in the fashion and textile technology program.

My collection Ultra Feminine Warrior opened the show as an Alumni of Buffalo State College. Even though I was not in the student competition for prizes, Althea is right, everyone is a winner from the experience of being part of a fashion show.

Having an opportunity to speak with Althea was too good to pass up. Kara and I met at the Clothes Bar shortly after 1:00 as this was a trunk show and we did not want to miss anything that might be sold early in the afternoon.

This was my first time in Clothes Bar. I missed the grand opening while I was a studying in the graduate program @ Savannah College of Art & Design.

Walking into the Clothes Bar is a pleasant surprise even if no celebrity is in the shop to greet you when you arrive. The Clothes Bar features garments, as seen on celebrities, geared for the young or at least young at heart with small waistlines and small wallets. Don't miss the wall of fame collection featuring celebrity fashion photos including a sweet, laugh @ the rain coat designed by Althea Harper worn by Beyonce that sold actually sold @ Clothes Bar for $1,100.

Tall and statuesque, it would be easy to confuse Althea for a model instead of the designer. She was at ease moving around the shop meeting and greeting the customers and sharing stories of her experience on Project Runway 6.

Be sure to visit Clothes Bar, located on Transit Rd. between Brennen's Bowery Bar and Bed, Bath & Beyond for an upscale shopping experience at very reasonable prices ;~)

Trapeze dresses are constructed of fabric falling straight from the shoulders with no shaping seams. Think “shapeless,” and you have the trapeze dress

Ultra Feminine Warrior this shear, sexy, full body armour, my final garment is an art object inspired by the Trapeze dress so popular in the 1960's.
Cut just above the knee in the front, gently suggesting a train in the back, I created an over sized tutu. The look is pure fun and truly playful. Aftrer all fashion shows are a place to express the extremes.
My wearable art object is hand stitched from generous yards of tulle is light, airy and just plain fun to wear. Embedded with silk floral elements and fiber optic lights you will be sure to be noticed. Trapeze dresses are best worn with sexy, light, strap, sandals paired with bare legs. I cut through the layers to expose a rich copper hued, 100 % silk chemise. Detach the snaps and wear the Tulle Tutu anyway you wish ;~)

" Contrary to what it sounds like, a trapeze dress is not something worn by a female flying aerialist. The name actually refers to the word "trapezoid," a geometric figure in which the sides flare out. The trapeze dress, narrow at the top and wider at the bottom, originally saw popularity in the 1950s and again became popular at the beginning of the 21st century.
A trapeze dress can have many variations and still fit the definition, but the term basically refers to a dress that is narrow at the bodice and flares out loosely at the bottom so that it swings freely. The classic trapeze dresses were sleeveless, but some featured long sleeves, sometimes cuffed.
Origin
Yves Saint Laurent became the head of the House of Dior when Christian Dior died in 1957. The following spring, the young Saint Laurent, only 21 when he was thrust into the spotlight, came up with a new collection that featured the trapeze dress. Part of the popularity of the new fashion was attributed to the freedom afforded by a loose-fitting garment in contrast to the tight waists women were used to wearing.

http://www.tulle.net/fashion.asp

History
In 1958 First Lady Mamie Eisenhower wore a silk shantung trapeze dress, decorated with bows, as part of her spring wardrobe; manufacturers produced instant copies, and the popularity of the style took off. By the 1960s the trapeze dress evolved, becoming a mini-dress and usually featuring a sleeveless top, sometimes cut to resemble a halter. The dress style has continued to fade in and out of style over the years. " http://www.ehow.com/about_5418362_trapeze-dress.html

With forty plus years of sewing experience, I have been designing dresses and creating wardrobe accessories for Kara and myself to enjoy.

Ultra Feminine Warrior collection was designed for celebrating energy, creativity, sacred power of women. My collection of wearable art includes; garments, objects and accessories inspired from military armor such as gorgets, gauntlets and gaiters illuminated with technological fiber optic elements.

My collection began as a conversation during lunch with a mentor, fueled by a creative spark, powered by immeasurable woman hours; of sketching, dyeing fabrics, and sewing ended up on Runway 3.0
I had chills in my body and joy in my heart watching the young ladies model the fruits of my labor. It was a wonderful learning experience and most of all a labor of love creating great fun ;~)

“Imagination is the beginning of creation. You imagine what you desire, you will what you imagine and at last you create what you will.”
George Bernard Shaw

Special thanks and deep appreciation to my daughter, Kara Rice Rafferty.
She is the graphic designer, web designer, marketing director as well as my partner in our cottage industry rice rafferty.
All of my collection was created with Kara in mind. Having a daughter is like having a live Barbie doll where I first realized my love of sewing. Kara graciously agreed to wear the over sized Tutu ;~)
I love you Kara, it is truly a pleasure to be your mom ;~)

Ultra Feminine Warrior – celebrating energy creativity, sacred power of women." carol ann rice rafferty

Having both the freedom to create and the spirit to achieve the process of assembling this collection was pure joy from conception to final walk on Runway 3.0 fashion show.

http://view.buffalostate.edu/main.php?g2_itemId=35782

No longer limited by the confines of getting a grade or passing a review my collection of wearable art includes; garments, objects and accessories inspired from military armor such as gorgets, gauntlets and gaiters illuminated with technological fiber optic elements.

The journey provided the pure joy as I was researching trends, finding inspirations, drawing sketches, dyeing yards of luxurious silk, sewing countless woman hours of both hand an machine stitching.

Chills filled my body as I watched six special young women bring my work to life on the runway.

http://www.blinkx.com/watch-video/runway-3-0-hits-buffalo/_sojAt1Fu-dSXdpXdp1Hyw

Ultra Feminine Warrior collection has been building in me for over forty years. It grew out of my love of sewing garments, social studies and history. When I was in high school I wrote my research paper on Fashion as a Reflection of Social Change. Returning to college when my youngest child began college I was awarded a Summer Research Grant Fellowship focused on learn textile and fiber reactive dyeing skills to create my own textile. Honestly, I have become a bit of a textile snob. Now I am no longer willing to work with fabrics and colors available to anyone else.

Although ultra feminine and soft to the hand, my work is laden with dichotomies; soft & sexy yet independent & capable. The collection consists of both fashion garments and art objects inspired by military armor. http://www.fashionising.com/trends/b--Spring-2010-Fashion-Trends-Womens-SS-2010-1288.htmlng-2010-Fashion-Trends-Womens-SS-2010-1288.html
My research revealed that Turquoise, one shoulder styling, braided hair, floral elements, bright, luscious hues all fashion trends for Spring 2010 were taken into consideration when I was creating my collection.

From ricerafferty Ultra Feminine Warrior sketch book

Simple wrap dress is made of 100% habotai silk, dyed a spring green can be wrapped in multiple ways to create a few different looks from one garment. Adorned with a bib necklace and fiber optic light leg accents inspired by military gaiters.

The first dress has braids, pattern of strength was repeated throughout the garments and hair styling from the Viking Warriors - red hair people are often of Viking decent. Her gaiters inspired from part of a military armor over the shoe or boots.

Fiber optic lights were embedded into all elements made of ivory bridal veil illusion in keeping with the Runway 3.0 theme Technology- the extremes we go to get noticed ;~)

Unfortunately during Runway 3.0 the flashes of fiber optic lights were not visible as the house lights were too bright. A more in depth explanation of the bib necklace is in my blog.

http://cariceraff.blogspot.com/2010/01/deep-inside-this-armor-warrior-is-child.html

Kristen Wright opened Runway 3.0 strutting with confidence and poise in the first selection of my Ultra Feminine Warrior collection.

Creative genius runs in Kristen's family. Kristen boasts Nikola Tesla as a relative about whom her grandmother has shared many wonderful family stories.

Thank you Kristen for being part of our the ricerafferty team for Runway 3.0 ;~)

The key to happiness is having dreams. The key to success is making your dreams come true.

Yesterday I entered a new phase of making my dreams come true ;~)

Playing with fabric, cutting patterns, sewing clothing for my dolls then for myself has been my passion since I was a little girl.

The first garment I made was a shift dress cut from old, floral, scrap, upholstery fabric when I was around ten years old. I was so proud of my first attempt to create a garment; reading the pattern, following the directions and learning to use a sewing machine on my own. My grandmother, Clara Rice, made me a white polka dots on sailor blue cotton background, tent dress that she had sewn by hand. My curiosity was whetted and the journey to teach myself to sew began.

Eagerly showing my grandmother and Aunt Mary Rice my first sewing project they turned the garment inside out and began to critique the mistakes in the my project. With all the diligence I used to practice learning to do a perfect cartwheel in my front yard I practiced, over and over, making mistakes after mistake, until I finally became confident with my sewing skills.

As a student @ Canevin High School 1970- 1974 most of the garments in my closet were the work of my hands. I had learned to knit, crochet and sew skirts, dresses, vests, and jackets to build my wardrobe. Never taking any of the home economics classes offered in high school I allowed the fear of another gruesome critique to keep me from registering in the classes.
Instead I taught myself to make a garment learning from each delicious mistake.

As a wedding present from my parents I requested and received a sewing machine. Gradually, during the years when I worked, got married and had Barry and Kara I my sewing machine gathered dust. In 1985, Jim's; Aunt Katie and Uncle George brought me a luscious piece of buffalo check, ivory and black, Irish wool fabric back from their vacation. After studying ready made skirts in the Irish Shop, Station Square in Pittsburgh, then selecting a pattern I made a beautiful skirt for myself that is still in my closet. It turned out so well that they asked me to make a skirt for both of Jim's sister; Maripat and Susie from additional wool fabric they had purchased.

I had discovered the "Me-ness of Me" as I called it when I got behind my sewing machine.

While working at my sewing machine I feel the freedom of a WWI flying ace.
I imagine myself to be flying in the open air cockpit, helmet on, scarf flapping behind me in the wind focused on my mission.


My Collection Ultra Feminine Warrior is the culmination of many years of sewing practice, education and following my dream to dye my own fabrics creating wearable art object, garments and accessories.


Simple wrap dress is made of 100% habotai silk, dyed a spring green can be wrapped in multiple ways to create a few different looks from one garment. Adorned with a bib necklace - see my blog for concept details...
http://cariceraff.blogspot.com/2010/01/deep-inside-this-armor-warrior-is-child.html

available on our etsy shop http://www.etsy.com/shop/ricerafferty


Kara is modeling my turquoise 100% silk charmeuse one shoulder tunic, hand stitched construction, adorned with up cycled jewelry embellishment. The longer skirt is Light Bubbled Gauze 100% Silk, elastic waist band for comfort and easy fit. Her outfit is accessorized with a bib necklace and bracelets made of ivory tulle inspired by a gauntlet with fiber optic lights as a focal point.
This short and sassy, elastic waist skirt is 100% Light Bubbled Gauze Silk adorned with an ivory tulle embellishment embedded with fiber optic lights.

Turquoise 100% silk, one shoulder, tunic offers the perfect background for this ivory, tulle, tutu embedded with floral elements and fiber optic lights is sure to gain attention on the dance floor ;~)



You will be a Lady of mystery wearing this ivory, veiled headdress for the times you need to work incognito is embedded with spring green, silk floral elements and fiber optic lights that will keep you from being overlooked when you crave attention. Perfectly paired with this spring green, 100 % habotai silk dress can be worn in several ways will add intrigue to you dressing pleasure.

Over sized tutu art object hand stitched from many yards of 100% tulle is light, airy and just plan fun to wear embedded with silk floral elements and fiber optic lights. Shown here worn over a rich copper, 100 % silk chemise. Detach the snaps and wear the tutu anyway you wish ;~)

My collection Ultra Feminine Warrior along with the work of Buffalo State College Fashion Majors and Design students will be featured in Runway 3.0 May 1st 2010 see links below for more information.

http://bscrunway.wordpress.com/

How do you describe the fruits of immeasurable, creative energy, woman hours in just two minutes??? You just do it !!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5shipz88iPs

some images of my work in progress stage in my home studio along with the work of Buffalo State College Fashion and Design students.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/finn1flintlock/sets/72157623810160700/show/

Looking forward to seeing you May 1st ;~)