“Run your fingers through my soul. For once, just once, feel exactly what I feel, believe what I believe, perceive as I perceive, look, experience, examine, and for once; just once, understand.”

Albert Einstein quoted - The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious... Sometimes there is lot of story behind a simple look, lot of effort, lot of work, lot of emotions and lot of many things :) which we just simply call mystery..Albert Einstein quoted

Yesterday was a good day.  I enjoyed a lovely, relaxing drive reconnecting with an old friend  during our drive from Buffalo to Syracuse.   Surface Design Association Members from Western New York State were invited to tour the Fiber Program at Syracuse University.  I knew about this invitation for many weeks however I was not able to commit because of a recent death in the family as well as the uncertainty of my own health concerns.   Here I am in a creative play room filled with recycled and up cycled materials.  This plastic chair was so surprisingly comfortable that I could not resist tossing my leg over the arm of the chair during the few minutes we were in this space.You can feel my delight at being able to attend this tour yesterday.

I am in day four of a kind of virtual waiting room. Since August 3rd I have been on a constant call list for repeated needle biopsies and pathology reports of my breasts following a mammogram that showed a tiny cluster of white calcium dots.  The funny part is I FEEL WONDERFUL ;~)   I just returned from my morning three mile walk carrying five pound hand weights for a full body workout.  If I am sick it will be news to my body.  I have just lived one of the best summers of my life enjoying being outside for many wonderful, hot, sunny days.

This virtual waiting room has it's advantages; fragrance of the grass, trees and flowers are more acute.  Food tastes better, colors call me to linger in an attentive gaze. Being with people I love is a treasure for me even when they are preoccupied by the hurry of life.  Life has a Halo Effect when you remember to number your days. I have received kind offers to help in various ways; go to doctors appointments with me, out to lunch, well wishes for good health and promises to keep me in prayer.

It is interesting to listen to the busy plans others have made for the next few months while I have to keep my plans simple on a wait and see day by day basis. Things that would have been important to me or might have hurt my feelings are not as important right now.  Right now I am in this waiting room to get results if I have cancer growing in a mass of cells that I can not even feel.

My purpose of sharing this experience on my blog is not for sympathy or to make you feel sadness. 
I write with the hope that someone who needs a word of encouragement will find my blog and read it one day.  These past few days in the virtual waiting room have been delightfully peaceful.  I have a deep faith in a spiritual reality that is much larger than the physical world we can see.   I believe in a creator who loves all of us and knows exactly what is going on in my life and my body before modern medicine told me they have concerns.  

Right now I continue to be an athlete in training.  I am an Ultra Feminine Warrior   I face life with the same energy and commitment I approached the natural child birth of Barry and Kara.  I will do all best on my part to keep myself strong and healthy then trust that God will bring me to the correct people at the correct time in my life. With the peace that passes understanding I wait...

 Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which passes all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7

 In the words of the Julian of Norwich I believe  
" ALL WILL BE WELL, AND EVERY KIND OF THING WILL BE WELL."
 http://home.infionline.net/~ddisse/julian.html

“We quaff the cup of life with eager haste without draining it, instead of which it only overflows the brim / objects press around us, filling the mind with the throng of desires that wait upon them, so that we have no room for the thoughts of death.”

“We quaff the cup of life with eager haste without draining it, instead of which it only overflows the brim / objects press around us, filling the mind with the throng of desires that wait upon them, so that we have no room for the thoughts of death.”

Oscar Wilde  Irish Poet, Novelist, Dramatist and Critic, 1854-1900)

Life was so simple when I believed in magic, that wishes really could come true and Santa Claus.  " Oh Cathy, Santa brought you to me. " is the quote my mother wrote on the back of this image of me taken taken Christmas morning.  Chatty Cathy has been silent many years since I accidentally pulled her string that made her talk too hard.  I still remember the sick feeling in the pit of my stomach the minutes after I realized what I had done.  Silent Cathy now sits in my living room on my wooden rocking chair from my childhood along with New Born Thumbelina and Tiny Tears.  Life was so simple and sweet back then.
 
This morning I took a ride in the shine new Siemens Magnetron Espree MRI machine.  I was told to put my camera away as no pictures are allowed to be taken in the room.
 see the website and you can get an idea of how I spent this morning.
 
http://www.medical.siemens.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/ProductDisplay~q_catalogId~e_-1~a_catTree~e_100010,1007660,12754,14330~a_langId~e_-1~a_productId~e_142246~a_storeId~e_10001.htm


Today I awoke around 5:30 this morning, started the coffee pot, checked the computer messages showered same as any other day. Except today was different I had a date with destiny.  Today was my second ride in the MRI in search of Breast Cancer this week.  Today we were going after a lump that showed up on the MRI imaging taken on Tuesday that never showed up on the Mammograms taken August 3rd.   How luck am I ??? The technician told me health insurance companies refuse to pay for MRI unless a woman has a personal history of cancer or has a strong family history.  I fall into the second category as my mother found her own breast cancer lump while in the bathtub at age 35.  Neither grandmother was diagnosed with cancer and they each died at age 93 although during separate years.

 It is said if we live long enough everyone will have some form of cancer.  http://www.cancer.org/
"Cancer starts when cells in a part of the body start to grow out of control. There are many kinds of cancer, but they all start because of out-of-control growth of abnormal cells."   I remember hearing people say someone "caught the cancer" when I was a little girl. Thankfully through education there is better understanding about cancer as a disease.  Unlike the flu, there is no need to avoid contact with anyone diagnosed with cancer to preserve your health.  In fact spending time in happy social settings is healing to everyone whether they have cancer or not.

My drive to the Imaging Center was peaceful in the break of dawn. Truly, I wished I was heading out on my morning walk instead going in search of cancer but I made the most of the journey. Turning off the radio I chose instead to talk with God during this morning drive.  I found myself in praise, " This is the day the Lord has made, let us be glad and rejoice in it."

Arriving for MRI at 6:45 has its perks;~)  I never found a place so close to the door in all of my years going for mammograms.  I was greeted at the door by a lovely woman named Judith with beautifully manicured finger nails.  While she got me checked in Judy shared some of her personal journey and words of encouragement.  She found it interesting that I am documenting this experience in my Art.  Funny point of interest, they photo ID me when I arrived for an MRI, like someone else was going to volunteer to go in my place. That gave me a chuckle.

Remove top garments, check, robe opens in front, check, personal effects in locker, check, final bathroom run then enter behind the double door first room on the right for an IV port.  Glasses and key in the basket,  left arm out of the gown, climb up on the table face down so we have access to your breasts.  Here I lay motionless with my left breast restrained in a clamp, table slides me back into the MRI.... Good thing I have ear plugs as the noise quickly changes from the sound of a heart beating to LOUD beeps and banging sounds.  In my meditative state I have no clue how long I am in there before the IV opens with a rush of chemicals to enhance the images.  I feel the fluid travel down my right arm, there is a warm tingle in my head followed by an odd taste and sensation of my tongue.  

While I lay there my belief in magical wishful childhood fantasy comes back to me. Why are they taking so long???   Maybe the mass is gone??? They will tell me there is no lump, nothing is there and I am free to go home with an all clear;~)

With my closed eyes I see the Caves of Lascaux from my Art History books.
 http://www.france-for-visitors.com/dordogne/perigord-noir/grotte-de-lascaux-and-lascaux-ii.html  
Just like the hunters praying for a good hunt, a mythopoeic vision of the optimum outcome is planted  in my head, I imagine myself cancer free and free to go.

Just then the technician opens the door to tell me the doctor is in the room to take the tissue samples from the mass.   The doctor introduces himself to me without looking at my face.  I am still lying face down on the table with my breast being held in a clamp.  "Don't move Carol", the the technician tells me as she pats comfortingly on my back she covered with a flannel blanket to keep me warm.

" Little bee sting" is the term they use when injecting the fast acting Lidocaine.  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lidocaine   More Lidocaine is given as the needle is inserted deeper into my breast.  " Back into MRI for more pictures Carol."  The needle is guided to the mass via MRI then back out for a drilling sound as six samples of tissue are removed from my breast.  A titanium hook is put into place that will be remove during surgery later this month.  Now I have a titanium hook in both right and left breast that will be connected to a line before the surgery.  The surgeon will follow the line back to the exact place of the biopsy in my breast. 

After the procedure I sat up to recollect myself and enjoyed a small glass of orange juice that reminded me of all the times I have donated blood. If I have cancer does that mean I am no longer able to help others by donating my blood??? Two more light compression mammograms.  I am sent out the door with instructions not to do any heavy lifting or exercise for the next twenty four hours.

Quick stop at the store for a new garbage disposal as the plumber is coming today to hook up water and gas lines in the kitchen.  Yesterday the installers brought in the new granite island and counter top, for the sink and cook top.  Life is what happens while you are busy making other plans ;~)

 After the plumber is gone I'm going for a walk outside around Clarence Town Park while I wait for the results of my biopsy.  I'll keep you posted with my results as soon as I hear but just for today ;~)

This is the day the Lord has made, let us be glad and rejoice in it.   Psalm 118:24

" Fashion is in my blood. Growing up, I was always clacking around the house in my mother's shoes. "

" Fashion is in my blood. Growing up, I was always clacking around the house in my mother's shoes." Sophia Bush

I inherited my mother's hazel eye color.
 
Her good taste for expensive fabrics, color, and fashion.
 
Her ability to listen with empathy during a conversation. 
 
Her excellent cooking, decorating and entertaining skills.
 
 This week I am waiting to see if I inherited her gene for Breast Cancer. 
 

My parents first Christmas in their new home 1952

My doctors have kept a watchful eye on me since I found the first lump in my breast at age 29.  Every year since then I have gone for annual mammograms. Some years they found a cyst that was easily aspirated with a needle using ultra sound technology.  I had a sense of joy and relief as I watched the cyst collapse when drained. 
 
For the past few years tiny white specks of calcium were pointed out to  me on my mammogram films. Often I got as far as the last office to the exit only to have to go back for another mammogram just to make sure it was all clear.   I am no stranger to wondering which way the door would open.  For years I wondered would I be spending the fall at Buffalo State College or would I go directly to Roswell Park Cancer Institute?  Believe me, it was with a sense of joy and appreciation when I made the calls to loved ones from the parking lot waiting to hear I got the all clear.
 
This summer has been a little different.  Since August 3, 2010 things have begun to change.  This time the doctor said, " Carol, I have a little concern about the growing cluster of calcium specks showing up. Let's get a needle biopsy today to be sure."   She said the was no lump but to be on the safe side I needed a Needle Biopsy to examine a little tissue.  Since I have been proactive about my health in general I was happy to work with the technicians to make everything go a quickly and smoothly as possible.
 

This image was taken in 1959 when my mom was 35 the year she found breast cancer.

                   Fred was 5, I was almost 3 and Mark was just under 1 year old.
My mother went on to live 35 more years after her breast cancer treatment and she did not die from cancer.  This information has been a message of hope and inspiration to many women in their battle against cancer.

Yesterdays my MRI showed a small lump, not fluid, this time in my left breast. 
Tomorrow morning I will have a MRI Needle Directed Biopsy will let me know if the cells in this lump are benign or not.  

Among all the other characteristics I inherited from my mother I possess her Courage as well as her ability to make lemonade when life throws me lemons.  During all of my hours of waiting for medical test I have been kind, caring and courteous to the other women who are anxiously waiting for what comes next.   No matter what my outcome is after tomorrow MRI guided Needle Biopsy, I am overwhelmed and thankful for the family and friends who have expressed care about me.  Three women have already offered to help me any time I need them. I am also thankful that I feel so strong and healthy right now. Each day I either walk three miles or ride my stationary bike 8 kilometers in addition to other daily household chores. 

Early detection is the best offense we have in any women's fight against breast cancer.

Remember

Most cases of breast cancer occur 'by chance'. However, breast cancer does occur more often than usual in some families because of their genetic make-up.
http://www.cancer.gov/cancertopics/pdq/genetics/breast-and-ovarian/HealthProfessional
 
http://www.patient.co.uk/health/Cancer-of-the-Breast-Hereditary-Factors.htmber

Barry, Kara, Me and Jim   September 1, 2010

I was trained through the American Cancer Society in Pittsburgh with Look Good Feel Better http://www.lookgoodfeelbetter.org/     This wonderful program provides free cosmetics, skin and beauty care treatments to anyone healing from cancer treatment.  

Inspired by the Look Good Feel Better concept Kara and I will be working on a series of  ricerafferty Breast Cancer Hope Statement Necklaces with a portion of the our sales going to cancer research.

“We all die. The goal isn't to live forever, the goal is to create something that will.”

“We all die. The goal isn't to live forever, the goal is to create something that will.”
 Chuck Palahniuk quotes (American freelance Journalist, Satirist and Novelist. b.1961)

There has been a death in our family this week.  My husband's last living aunt died peacefully in her home after a heroic fight against Pancreatic cancer.  His aunt and uncle had no children of their own.  They generously chose to lavishly shower love, attention and financial gifts to their nieces and nephews.
Aunt Katie's death is a time when family will gather together, remember happy times, begin to heal from the recent loss and promise try to spend more time together despite nationwide domiciles we all now call home.

While I was in graduate school at Savannah College of Art and Design 2008 -2009 I spent as much time and energy learning about myself as I did on the course work.   Professors feedback during my Reviews commented how deep, dark and tortured my artwork communicated to the viewer. 

• I was constantly questioning, writing in my journal, researching metaphors and symbolism of my inspirations.
• What had I done with my life for the past 50 years? 
• What really is important to me?
• How did I plan to spend the remainder of my life?  

 I read the Ten Things to do Before You Die then made my own list.
In my searching I found this interesting challenging website
http://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2005/01/how-to-discover-your-life-purpose-in-about-20-minutes/

" Here’s what to do:

Take out a blank sheet of paper or open up a word processor where you can type (I prefer the latter because it’s faster).

Write at the top, “What is my true purpose in life?”


Write an answer (any answer) that pops into your head. It doesn’t have to be a complete sentence. A short phrase is fine.


Repeat step 3 until you write the answer that makes you cry. This is your purpose.


That’s it. It doesn’t matter if you’re a counselor or an engineer or a bodybuilder. To some people this exercise will make perfect sense. To others it will seem utterly stupid. Usually it takes 15-20 minutes to clear your head of all the clutter and the social conditioning about what you think your purpose in life is. The false answers will come from your mind and your memories. But when the true answer finally arrives, it will feel like it’s coming to you from a different source entirely.

As you go through this process, some of your answers will be very similar. You may even re-list previous answers. Then you might head off on a new tangent and generate 10-20 more answers along some other theme. And that’s fine. You can list whatever answer pops into your head as long as you just keep writing.

At some point during the process (typically after about 50-100 answers), you may want to quit and just can’t see it converging. You may feel the urge to get up and make an excuse to do something else. That’s normal. Push past this resistance, and just keep writing. The feeling of resistance will eventually pass.

You may also discover a few answers that seem to give you a mini-surge of emotion, but they don’t quite make you cry — they’re just a bit off. Highlight those answers as you go along, so you can come back to them to generate new permutations. Each reflects a piece of your purpose, but individually they aren’t complete. When you start getting these kinds of answers, it just means you’re getting warm. Keep going.
It’s important to do this alone and with no interruptions. If you’re a nihilist, then feel free to start with the answer, “I don’t have a purpose,” or “Life is meaningless,” and take it from there. If you keep at it, you’ll still eventually converge.

When I did this exercise, it took me about 25 minutes, and I reached my final answer at step 106. Partial pieces of the answer (mini-surges) appeared at steps 17, 39, and 53, and then the bulk of it fell into place and was refined through steps 100-106. I felt the feeling of resistance (wanting to get up and do something else, expecting the process to fail, feeling very impatient and even irritated) around steps 55-60. At step 80 I took a 2-minute break to close my eyes, relax, clear my mind, and to focus on the intention for the answer to come to me — this was helpful as the answers I received after this break began to have greater clarity." 

*For those who are very entrenched in low-awareness living, it will take a lot longer to get all the false answers out, possibly more than an hour. But if you persist, after 100 or 200 or maybe even 500 answers, you’ll be struck by the answer that causes you to surge with emotion, the answer that breaks you. If you’ve never done this, it may very well sound silly to you. So let it seem silly, and do it anyway.

What is my true purpose in life? Carol Ann Rice Rafferty April 2009
to give to everyone and never count the cost
to give and give and give until there is nothing left of me
to make everyone around me happy
to take care of my family’s needs
to enjoy a good sex life
to have children
to reproduce myself  in my art
to take care of the earth
to be a good teacher
to make the world a better place
to smile at everyone I meet along my path
to take care of my body
to protect the innocent children, animals, old people, those with disabilities
to make as much money as I can
to show everyone how smart I am or am not
*to share a smile with people who look sad
to admit how afraid I am so others are not so alone
to be a friend and care about other people
to listen to a lonely person tell their life story
to share a smile as I pass along lifes journey 
*to bring happiness by being present to other souls who are lonely
to help people feel as if they matter
to learn as much as I can about myself
to learn about the earth
to learn math no just kidding

As an Artist each object I create is in a very real sense an offspring of myself.  My work has been evolving and growing exponentially since Barry and Kara are adults. Soon after I wrote my lists for the True Purpose of  my Life and Ten Things to do Before I Die my need for attending graduate school was fulfilled.  I emancipated myself to live my dreams of creating a cottage industry with my daughter Kara.

 www.ricerafferty.com/

As our family mourns the loss of Aunt Katie, gives thanks and celebrates her life, I realize her death is an invitation to living that we celebrate each day with an Attitude of Gratitude.

When Jos Mart named the things that every man ought to do before he dies, the list did not include “Liberate a country.” The hero of Cuban independence named three more important tasks: " Plant a tree, write a book, have a son. That’s an excellent start. " 
 Make your own list if you have not done so already. 
Give thanks for the gift of life and begin to check things off your to do list today ...
 
 Wishing you a VERY CREATIVE DAY ;~)

" For all that has been ... Thanks. For all that will be ... Yes! " Dag Hammarskjold

" For all that has been ... Thanks. For all that will be ... Yes!"  Dag Hammarskjold

This summer I have been taking long walks or riding my bike several times a week in search of  peace through natural surroundings.  My journey has been inside myself as much as it has been in the physical world. I am always open to the creative spark. When I see a vision in my minds eye of the next object I need to create I make sketches to hold the image then begin working. 

This summer I has been visualizing a vessel or bowl shaped object.  Looking through my collection of paper and used coffee filters I worked intuitively letting the materials speak to me.  The image on the left is a detail of Blessing Bowls inspired by a chalice and paten or diskos. 

The paten and the chalice are each made of three layers of recycled paper.

The number three is a symbolism of magic, intuition, fecundity, and advantage.

• Three invokes expression, versatility, and pure joy of creativity.
• Three is also a time identifier as it represents Past, Present and Future.
• Consecutive Threes in your life may symbolize the need to express yourself creatively, or consider your present directional path in relation to past events and future goals.
• Three may also represent promising new adventures, and assurance of cooperation from others whom you may require help.

 Three typically symbolizes reward and success in most undertakings.

The Symbolism of the Bowl form is the circle, an ancient and universal symbol of unity, wholeness and infinity. To earth-centered religions throughout history, it represents the feminine spirit or force, the cosmos, a spiritualized Mother Earth, and a sacred space with generative and regenerative powers

While I was working on this object I had the strong feelings that this piece was both male and female.
Looking down on this image from above I can see why.

As I was making the bowls and paten it was very important to me that the perimiter was burned around all edges with fire.  Again, I was working intuitively so I followed my urges then researched the symbolism of fire.

• "Traditionally, fire represents the active and masculine Yang of Chinese symbolism.
• It is most closely related to the sun and the powers of change and purification.
• Contrasting to water, fire moves upward with rising energy; therefore, the alchemical symbol is an upward pointing triangle.
•  Fire can also be represented by a sword. "

http://symbolism.wikia.com/wiki/Fire

A bowl is a container of beneficence and the site of transformation.. Throughout history it’s various forms have manifested as the holy grail, the goblet and the chalice, the magic cauldron, Persephone’s Golden bowl of healing that can regenerate the dead and heal the sick, and Demeter’s Cista Mystica or magic basket and the Alchemists crucible.

Blessing Bowl made of recycled coffee filters

What is the Blessing Bowl?

 The Blessing Bowl is a vessel to share caring, love, thoughtfulness, compassion, joy, feelings, gratitude, and more.   It can hold representative objects or written acknowledgment of the blessings in your life. The most meaningful gift you'll ever receive, the Blessings Bowl is a gift of gratitude, a way to connect with our spirituality, a customized gift that celebrates life's blessings. So often we forget to tell people in our life how much they mean, the Blessing Bowl gives you the opportunity to tell them how important they are.

Attracting Wealth and Blessings

The idea of wealth can mean a lot of different things. To many of us it means money, however, being in a state of wealth is not limited to just a financial state. To me health is true wealth. Feng Shui can be used to increase the wealth of our non-material assets as well. This includes helping to foster a calm, clear, relaxed state of mind, as well as a joy for life. The wealth of clarity and consciousness is real wealth.

Paper Bowls

Paper is the most widely used around the world of all the materials that people have employed down the ages.  Crude papers were being made in China by c. 100 BCE. Its name derives from papyrus the material used by the ancient Egyptians, Greeks and Romans.

These papier mache bowls are visually enticing as well as practical. They can be used as decorative objects or containers.


The bowls are made out of 100% recycled papers, used coffee filters or handmade papers and then coated with a water-based finish to make them sturdy and usable.

If you do not care to use the bowls for ritual purposes, they can be used as beautiful containers for any of the following; jewelry, office supplies, shells, stones, buttons,  business cards, keys, dried flowers, pocket change, natural gemstones, guitar picks, slips of paper with inspiring quotes, fruit, marbles or potpourri.

Place what you want to achieve inside this bowl; to renew a friendship place a telephone number; to help get a job place the advertisement; to smooth difficulties with your children place something that belongs to them; to reaffirm a marriage place a piece of jewelry with a special meaning.

Of all the possible meanings that these bowls can have, it is what they mean to you that is the most important.

" You Can't Go Home Again" novel by Thomas Wolfe.

 "You can't go back home to your family, back home to your childhood ... back home to a young man's dreams of glory and of fame ... back home to places in the country, back home to the old forms and systems of things which once seemed everlasting but which are changing all the time — back home to the escapes of Time and Memory."  from novel by Thomas Wolfe.

My family home was sold in 1993, my parents are deceased 15 years and my brothers are not living in Pittsburgh anymore.  It really is impossible for me to go to a physical home in Pittsburgh. Thomas Wolfe was speaking about how we are different as we mature. Growing up in Greentree living in the South Hills of Pittsburgh for 42 years makes going back to Pittsburgh a homecoming for me every time I visit.

This visit was unique as I had an opportunity to see many of the people I attended Sts. Simon & Jude Grade School and Canevin High School for the first time in 36 years. Since I was 17 when I graduated from high school and this is our 36th year Reunion we have been apart more than twice the years that I was in age when we went out into the world to make our separate ways.

That's me in the second row standing to the left of Sr. Isabel with the other tall girls.

If you don't see these old classmates all the time may be best to begin with a warm up Pre Reunion dry run the evening before or a brunch the day of the Reunion. 

See my blog  http://cariceraff.blogspot.com/2010/08/getting-to-know-you-getting-to-know-all.html

Here I am standing in the second row left of Fr. Carey again with the tall girls

Sts. Simon & Jude the way we are now ;~)

Name tags with images from the yearbook are a nice touch.  Even with the name tags there were still plenty of names and people who I never met while we were at Canevin for four years. I made a point to walk around the ball room a few times throughout the evening reading names to see if I missed anyone. 

Dan Blankowski , Me and Ken Frazier

Karen Keane Janes and me, now facebook friends, share a quick picture.

Pat Topal Shank and I take a break from all the mingling. Pat a fellow Artist now a facebook friend said it was good to finally see me in 3-D ;~)

The 36 year Class Reunion felt like a cross between our Freshman Mixer Dance and a Masquerade Ball.  The Freshman Mixer was held at Canevin on a Friday night a few weeks after we began classes in 1970.  During the Reunion I realized what an intuitive 13 year old girl I was.  I was using the same skill, looking into each persons eyes to find nice people to speak with that night.  It is said, "Eyes are the windows of the soul."   Even if the person did not look the same at first as we spoke I could see in their eyes why some of those classmate I had chosen as friends in high school.

I'm in the middle again, second row, right of center, tall ladies are asked to sit.

I am seeing a pattern of me liking being in the middle of the group ;~)

Here is a nice touch video for our class picture so we can remember who was there and where we live now made by our classmate and Master of Ceremonies Dan Blankowski  and his wife Conni http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=629182980#!/video/video.php?v=1416929906723&ref=mf

Since you can't go home again as the same person you were when you left it is best to assume you need to get to know your past classmates as the beautiful and new people they have grown to be also. 

Here is a James Taylor version of the song Getting to Know You

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j7E8dC2g_XA&feature=related

Tips to make your Reunion or any social gathering more comfortable;

Wear something comfortable that expresses who you are.  I chose plain black legging, a black tank top under my black bathing suit cover up.  To dress up a very neutral canvas I accessorized  my look with sparkley beaded slip on sandles, a vintage glass beaded glass shoulder bag and of course my own work by ricerafferty.  Nouveaux Antique Gorget Style Silk Charmeuse Adornment Bib Statement Necklace is super light, comfortable and will make you memorable  in any gathering.

see   http://www.etsy.com/shop/ricerafferty              or               http://ricerafferty.com/

Don't ask a lot of personal questions when you see someone after years of being apart. 

Instead allow the person to open up like a flower blossom revealing what is comfortable for them to share about themselves.

Don't assume anyone has missed the opportunity to grow in 36 years. 

Look into their eyes and allow them to share what is on their mind with you.

My husband was previously engaged for the day so I attended my Reunion solo.  It is not a bad way to fly as you don't have to fill a date in on a lot of events they have no clue what you are talking about.

 It is your Reunion don't be afraid to attend alone.

Relax, enjoy yourself and get to know old classmates in a new way. 

Honestly, even if reunions are not your thing, all too soon the weekend will be over and it will be time to go back to the life you created for yourself. 

Right now I am enjoying these images and the memories.

I look forward to helping Dan make our 40th a warm and welcoming event on July 19th, 2014 ;~)

I won a PRIZE from Frank Daily gift certificate from his business http://www.bpwp.net/burghs/htdocs/index.php

Pat, Me and Tim Killmeyer

Linda and Wayne Caruthers, Pat, Me, Steve Grohowalski and Al Opzynski

"Getting to know you, getting to know all about you. "Oscar Hammerstein from the musical The King & I 1956

" Getting to know you, getting to know all about you. Getting to like you, getting to hope you like me. Getting to know you, putting it my way, But nicely, You are precisely, My cup of tea. "

 Oscar Hammerstein  from the musical The King & I  1956

                                                                             http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3aVbJhg23Ao

Little did I know my last blog entry about high school reunions would cause such a big commotion.   Obviously, high school reunions are a bit of sticky wicket for many as that blog entry has had hits from people around the world who must be trying to make the decision, "should I stay or should I go" ???

High school was an alright time for me. Being a bit of a wild pony the dress code rules were pretty lame. Canevin is a Catholic school where the girls wore a grey pleated skirt that was supposed to be to the knee when you knelt on the floor. Not a problem as most of us rolled those skirts up until we had two more cheeks to powder.  Uniform also had a navy blue blazer that was fine because it the a classic design and having pockets is always a good thing.  We wore a white blouse under this blazer and that was the place I pushed the limits of the dress code by always wearing colorful  knee socks that coordinated with my bra.  Many times I was stopped in the hall and given a talking to by some well meaning nun.  As a girl with an eye for fashion & design I not going to dress like the rest of the pack. I always listened very nicely, nodded my head and kept expressing my individuality with those colorful bras and knee socks.

A girls got to do what a girls got to do ;~)

I don't remember anyone being mean to me in high school, however, the ones that were kind will always have a prominent place in my memories.

As I said in the last blog;

• Five Year Reunion was too soon, besides I was pregnant with Barry and involved with different interests. 
• Ten Year Reunion Kara was an baby, I was still nursing and didn't want to leave her. 
• Twenty Year Reunion was 1994 the year my mother died followed in death by my father seven  months later.  I was the primary caretaker for them during the three years before they died as well as a wife and mother.  Reunions were the last thing on my at that time.

 I did not avoid  my reunions for any other reason than I was busy with my life.

After my last blog entry Wayne Caruthers writes a retort in his blog about why he enjoys attending the Reunions. Evidently our blogs were making a buzz on face book.  Dan Blankowski calls me out a deep sleep one evening last week asking me what he could do to get me to attend the 36th Reunion, Saturday night.  Dan was so sweet, we chatted for an hour.  I had info on many of the students that were on the MIA list.   How could I refuse the "Red Carpet" treatment from Mister Personality, Dano ???  

Next day I shot him an email,  OK,  count me in;~)

At Dan's suggestion I am going to request you respond to my blog.  Who are you ???

 I told him it would be interesting too see what we all look like now and that I was not so much interested in your degrees or how financially successful you are.
I am very  much interested in WHO ARE YOU ???

•  How do you make this world a better place??? 
•  Do we have anyone in our class who invented something to improve the quality of life??? 
• Any medical researchers with break through discovery??? 
• Do you help feed the hungry in a soup kitchen or sew blankets for the sick??? 
• Are you volunteering to teach someone how to read that would otherwise struggle with being illiterate??? 

  Who are you ???

 The opening brunch the morning of the reunion was a good way to us get to know each other as adults.  When I told the ladies I had invited my grade school/ high school friend Wayne and his lovely wife Linda to the lunch they said, "Carol, how could you invite a guy to our hen party."

                   Pleased to say we all had a great time and they are all now friends on face book too.  

Above Pat Topol Shank, Joan Plouy Goyke, Wayne Caruthers, his lovely, wife Linda who listened to a weekend of stories about people she did not even know and  she took many of the group images for us. 
Thank you Linda ;~)

Trish Mullen Riani, Karen Keane Janes, Mary Jo Mariani Bondi

Hard to pull ourselves away from the Getting to Know YOU Brunch...

One last quick pic outside until we saw each other again that evening.  At the brunch Pat decided to attend the Reunion also.  Some people follow the crowd with ease, they don't want to be left out. Others are busy dancing to their own beat and need to see something interesting to move us out or our zone into the crowds. 

We decided that going to at least one class Reunion was worthy of the list Ten must do things before I die. 

 http://www.forbes.com/forbes-life-magazine/2000/0918/082.html

Sorry I missed the official get together sponsored by class mate Frank Daily the night before @ his establishment Burghs'

 News is PREUNION ... at Burgh's in Bridgeville was a ROUSING success, thanks to '74 classmate FRANK DAILY and his staff. The service was impeccable ... the hospitality was extraordinary, and the pizza & wings were SUPER!!! You can visit Burgh's online at www.bpwp.net

 If you haven't been to Burgh's yet, please visit soon (and often) and try the food and the service!!

THANK YOU to Frank for the Preunion party!!!  

I know I'll be going to Burghs's soon as I won the gift certificate he donated as a  prize at the Reunion later that night.

Next blog will be about my experience of attending a class Reunion after 36 years.  Waiting for more images before I write the post. You can tell you right now.  I had a WONDERFUL EVENING ;~)